no matter what u said..
if i could redo one thing about today..
i would wan the sms nv to have been sent out..
no matter what u said..
i would still wan today's conversation to have nv existed..
no matter what u said..
i'd rather be still ignorant..
no matter u said..
i would still wish that u took my suggestion in the sms..
no matter what u said..
i still wan..

if i could redo anything abt today..
i would not have sent the sms out..

if i could redo anything within a week..
i would have brought the pillow case for my pillow instead of a bolster case..

if i could redo anythin within 2 weeks..
i would have asked my professor about whether my essay topic was suitable..

if i could redo anything within the past month..
i would have studied harder for the mcq test i failed..again..

if i could redo anythin within the past 2 months..
i would not have started playing the sims 2 again..

if i could redo anythin within the past 6 months..
i would have taken up those dance classes and swimming classes that i wanted to for so long..

if i could redo anythin within the past 9 months..
i rather not meet those ppl that made me wonder abt how some ppl could have done smt so atrocious and think no one can find out abt it..

if i could redo anything within the past 1 yr..
i would not have allowed myself to see how a backview can become smaller and smaller..

if i could redo anything within the past 2 yrs..
there's nothin to redo..i'd rather go back to 2002 or 2003 in J1 or J2..

if i could redo anythin within the past 5 yrs..
i would have not gone to njc..

people say..
the more u noe what happiness tastes like..
the more u noe what sadness tastes like..
for me..
solving any problem should start at the root..
just like green chemistry remember?
get rid of pollutants at the most basic level..
since the cause of all sadness and frustrations i had or that i have stemmed from the fact that i chose to go to njc..
mayb it would be the best if i had nv joined it..

the more i noe happiness..
the more i noe sadness..
how true..
forgetting everythin is tough..
but i have to..
do i..?
i have to..
must i..?
i must..
can i..?
it's not a question of can or cannot..
i..
in the end..

if u ask me..
wat i would change if i could redo the 5 yrs..
perhaps..
even knowing the outcome now..
i still would have done the choices i made..
i still would have..
cept make some changes here and there so that damage is minimal..

in the end..
i..
m still just a girl..
who cant stop wondering..
"what if i could"..

in the end..
today..
seems like a repeat again..

today..
i wish..
i could have redone the whole of today..
i wish..
i could forget abt any conversation..
i wish..
that i nv knew anything..
ignorance is bliss..
it is always bliss..
sometimes..
it's ur heart vs ur mind..
for me..
when i saw the conflict of actions some days back..
i chose my heart over my mind..
and today..
i was forced to choose my mind over my heart..

do you noe how hard it feels..?
time will wash away everything..?
fine..
for me..
previously it was 9 yrs..
this time..
i still need another 5 yrs..

i guess..
onli i would have the patience to wait..

2:01 AM